For Our Daughters
For Our Daughters, a 30-minute documentary by Kristin Kobes Du Mez and available to watch for free on YouTube, was prompted by the final chapter of her book Jesus and John Wayne, entitled “Evangelical Mulligans: A History.” That chapter details a number of sexual abuse cases in the evangelical church and the subsequent film uses the voices of women who have not only been sexually abused and assaulted by evangelical church leaders but then faced ridicule and additional injury after coming forward with their stories. The film recounts these stories of sexual abuse and harassment–stories that were dismissed, ignored, buried, or justified by blaming the victim.
If you have not yet watched this film, you should. Then you should watch it again. And then you should share the film with a group of people and watch it for a third time.
Why should you watch this film more than once?
The simple answer is this: the women in your life don’t feel safe.
Next week, we in the United States will inaugurate a president who has been convicted of sexually abusing E. Jean Carroll (along with 34 other felony convictions). This incoming president was elected–and supported–by a large number of evangelical Christians, many of whom hold positions of power and authority in their congregations and denominations. For many in the church, being convicted of sexual abuse doesn’t disqualify one from holding the highest, most powerful position in the nation.
Additionally, in the last few weeks, the media has covered the story of Gisèle Pelicot, the French woman who was covertly drugged and raped by her husband and over 50 men between 2011 and 2020.
According to the RAINN (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network) website, 1 out of every 6 women in the United States has been the victim of rape or sexual assault.
Women don’t feel safe.
While this film doesn’t trace how segments of the church ended up with a culture of toxic masculinity and prevalent sexual abuse (there are resources for that on the film’s website), it does extend an implied call for accountability. What we see in For Our Daughters is case after case, story after story, of women reporting abuse and their abuser getting away with it, often in a very public manner. Men in pastoral leadership roles maintained their positions even after admitting to the abuse, and their victims are victimized all over again as they witness the lack of accountability for their abuser.
As Rachel Denhollander says in the film, “It costs you something to side with the vulnerable and the weak and the oppressed. It costs you nothing to side with the one who’s in power.”
That is what we see in the film: The desire for holding power surpasses the rights of abused women. Men think they can get away with abuse because they can get away with it. Abusers aren’t held accountable, in fact they are actually protected, which results in the perpetuation of an unbalanced power system in churches, in politics and government, in marriages, and in families.
This is a place where accountability needs to come in. If church leaders want women to feel safe, there needs to be real accountability in abuse cases. We need to get back to the biblical mandate that church leaders are held to a higher standard–a standard that embraces love, humility, and care for others.
As the film states, “those of us who are raising our voices are not calling for a departure from Christ, but rather a return to who Christ really is.”
thank you for this review and for bringing the film to our attention. Your words are passionate, and raw, while at the same time filled with truth that is well researched. Thanks, Kathryn.